Little things I've done this week at work just to survive the endless tedium

1) Thrown Dove dark chocolate candy wrappers over a co-workers cubicle wall, because they have such inspiring messages. Like, "Sleep under the stars tonight" or "A gentle touch speaks volumes". How can I not share these pearls of wisdom??

2) The simultaneous wink and finger-shoot at coworkers when passing them in the hall.

3) When coming back from the bathroom, instead of taking my key card out of my pocket to let myself back into the office, I turn so that my side with the key is facing the door, and jump. See how many jumps it takes before I get enough air to unlock the door from my pocket.

4) Eaten a large bag of m&m's.

5) Taken to responding sarcastically to emails that are not seeking a response. For instance: my boss is a former salesperson, and loves LOVES some man who speaks and writes books on salesmanship. So she regularly emails out to our division (including to those of us - like myself - who are not in sales) little bits of advice from his books. They always go something like this:
"When a contact tells you that they do not have time to talk to you, do you:
A) Demand to speak to their supervisor
B) Sit down and say that you'll wait until they do have time - no matter how long it takes.
C) Tell them you'll call again, and before you follow up next time, research how you can meet their needs.
D) Go home early."

And then it goes into this long-ass explanation of why the wrong ones are wrong and the right ones are right. The weirdest thing about that part is, I swear, they don't make it that obvious in the explanation which one they want you to pick. They might talk about why each one is kind of right, but I guess one is better than the others (kinda SAT style). And really, shouldn't they just have "C" written very clearly somewhere? If they want to convey their ideas successfully? Maybe this sales guy needs some written communication help (I know all of mine do.) Anyway, a lot of times I don't read these, but sometimes I do, just because I want to prove that they are as ridiculous as they seem, and that the answers are just common sense.
So, I haven't said anything to her about these yet, because, as I said, she loves this guy. But recently two of her own superiors played a little joke on her. Called her into an office, asked her a question, and read her A-D multiple choice answers, and laughed and laughed at their own joke. Naturally, she didn't get what was so funny. But I did - straight away. She thought that was "so quick" of me - but really it just means that I've thought about making fun of this many times before, whereas she never has.
So, to get back to it... I've started responding to her with my own answers. Like today, the question was on why networking is so important, and the answer was something about lasting relationships. But I wrote back and put "E) Because sometimes you get free drinks." Which isn't so much meant to be funny, as it is just true. For me at least. That would be my #1 reason. Because just the word "networking" gives me the heebie-jeebies. (I'm not really sure what a heebie-jeebie is, but if it exists, that's what hearing "networking" gives me.)

hm. That's all I can think of for now. I know this makes it sound like I have nothing better to do at work, but I swear, I'm overwhelmed to the point of frozenness. Sometimes a girl's gotta take a step back and share some candy wrappers, you know?


On a completely different note:
I think I shared last time about how undedicated I am to boot camp. We're supposed to write down everything we eat, follow their plan of eating 6 small healthy meals a day, and get that little food log checked every day. If you say, have a soft drink or a cookie - MORE BOOT CAMP FOR YOU!! You stay an extra 5 minutes for extra work at the end of the session. Well, I haven't brought in my book since week 1. Which means I get the extra work - which is fine, because if I had my book, I would be getting extra work plus diassproving looks and lectures on balancing your cabrs and proteins and not eating peanut butter, and blah, blah. Well, today it started raining at the end of camp, so I high-tailed it out of their to my car and skipped the extra stuff. And then who did I run into coming out of a Mellow Mushroom 10 minutes later, carrying a big box of pizza?? My boot camp instructor! How lucky am I?
And ok, so the box looked big, but there was only one slice in there! It wasn't like I was bring an entire pizza home to eat by myself (not that there's anything wrong with that, Gorilla.) And I had a salad, too! Which, uh... makes the pizza ok?
Oh, they're really going to use this tomorrow. (sigh.)

(Down at the bottom here you'll notice my "labels" for posts. One is called "odd people I work with". I created it when I worked at the lab, and since I wrote about work, I figure I should use it, since it's my only work label and all, right? But now the only odd person I work with is myself! The "odd people" is just me. I think I'm ok with that.)