Some stuff I learned this weekend

Alternative title: Some stuff you don't care about, but I've got some time to kill.

 

1)  "Flying Dog in Heat Wheat" beer, you are not only fun to say, but you taste good too.  yum.

 

2)  Spat-, Stat-?..., whatever you were, you were an even tastier beer, but because you were not named by a 13-year-old boy, I will probably never remember what you were called.  You with the mature, adult name, we may never meet again, unlike FDinHW, who I'm sure I'll be seeing around.

 

3)  Remember when I said before that my niece bit a kid at school for trying to take her cookie?  And I was secretly a little bit proud of her?  Well, she has extended the over-protectiveness to other food groups, and even towards her beloved favorite aunt.  At the age of 21 months, she punched me in the face when I tried to take a piece of fruit from her bowl.  This wasn't any little baby shove, no, this was a PUNCH.  In my face.  I learned that for her, "NOOOOOO!!!" means no.  Or I will punch you in the face.  (Coincidentally, I punched myself in the face this weekend in my sleep.  I know because it woke me up.  Over all, not the best of weekends for my cheekbones.)

 

4)  My brain has the ability to completely shut itself off without asking permission first.  And then, what's a girl to do?  Nothing.  She has no brain, remember?

 

5)  I am not too ashamed to count priming some walls as my work-out for the day.  I will even be chanting "paint of fence" in Mr. Miyagi's voice in my head while doing so.

 

6)  I am also not too ashamed to follow a day of fake exercise with a day where I count standing on a soccer field, verbally instructing for an hour and a half as my work out for that day.  I will then celebrate all this working out with much feasting.

 

7)  I still like kids.  I mean, I never thought I really disliked  them exactly, but I haven't wanted to spend time with them like I used to.  See, I've coached soccer teams in the past for...hmm... maybe 8 years all together?  (That's like, half my life, by the way.)  First three years were in college, and I absolutely loved it.  A few years later, I changed jobs and had the ability to make plans after work for the first time ever, and I coached one team for another 3 years.  I still loved it, but by the end, I was ready for a break.  After a year's break, I got talked into helping another team.  When I quit with them, I was worn out, burnt out on kids and even more so on their parents.  And most of the time, rather than enjoying it, they were just driving me crazy.  And I can't say I've missed it since.  But last week, three of the girls I had coached in that middle stint tracked me down, and asked if I would play with them before their school tryouts.  They were in 6th grade the last time I worked with them, and they are sophomores in high school now.  And while it was flattering that they remembered me, and not in such a way that was all, "ew!  she was so weird!  I'm so glad I never have to see her again!", I wasn't looking forward to it.  I used to have so much I wanted to teach them that there seemed like there was never enough time, but now, my brain feels dead on ideas.  I think my brain is rather uninspired in general these days.  But once I got there, I had a lot of fun!  And it was great to see them all (kind of) grown up, too.  And not only did I have fun with them, but I realized I kind of liked running around a field and kicking a ball.  (I stopped playing as well, and hadn't been missing that either.)  Also, even though they were so changed - there's a big difference in an 11 year old girl and a 16 year old girl - it was good to see that some parts of each of them were unchanged.  For instance, the two tomboys who used to think all the other girls' talk of boys was yucky and stupid are now ALL ABOUT their boyfriends, but the goofy one is still goofy, and the one that is a nerd for soccer is still a nerd for soccer.  And I loved that.

 

8)  A 15-year-old who slides into a big pile of dog poop, getting it all down her sock and shoe, can handle it with more grace than I can as I watch it smoosh all around her leg.

 

9)  I am not nice.  Per this statement by teenagers: "If we make JV, you should come coach us!  Because Mrs. so-and-so is too nice."

 

10)  It is not possible for me to ask for personal advice from a coworker-friend without seeing a coworker-non-friend's head peak up over some lab instrument, closer to me and my conversation than she needs to be, and ultimately have her pop up from her hiding place, and deliver a lecture about what I need to do based on how things are done "in this country", revealing without embarrassment that she had been eavesdropping all along.  sigh.